therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I love having hate sex.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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