If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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