there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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