I want to stick my p in your. b.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
