508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I need to align my fucking chakras
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