you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
