who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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