so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
