Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize