I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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