I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
