I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
i now understand why vodka
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
