YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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