Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
