We're facebook friends in real life
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
