So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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