Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
