you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize