im gay
i know
yea but for you.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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