after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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