I am puke
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Randomize
