Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
