You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Drake has all the answers
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
