She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
