Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
