Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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