i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
