He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
