I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
