Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Randomize
