So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
