Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
