Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize