i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
