would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
