Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
