Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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