When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize