it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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