sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
