I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
