I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize
