she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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