Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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