Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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