you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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