My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Randomize
