We're facebook friends in real life
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
