Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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