Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
