I love having hate sex.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
