a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
