I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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